Sleepless Monsters
by fringeperson
Summary: The population of Konoha rather over-estimated the sealing abilites of the Fourth, and Naruto had to listen to the Kyuubi rant about it all the time, among other things. oneshot, don't own, plot-bunny is free to good hutch.


They were all liars. The people at the academy who spouted the virtues of all the Hokages, past and present? They didn't even know the half of it. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Well, maybe they were right about some stuff, but they had _seriously_ over-estimated the Yondaime's sealing skills.

If he'd really been as crash-hot as the instructors said he was, then Naruto wouldn't have had the Kyuubi's constant running commentary going on in the back of his head for longer than he could remember. If he'd really been so awesome at sealing, Naruto would have been able to sleep without running the risk of the fox taking over his body. If he'd _really_ been that fan-_fucking_-tastic, he wouldn't have _died_ doing something so _bloody simple_.

Naruto, it has to be said, didn't have all that much respect for his father's abilities as a seal master – and yes, he knew. The fox was more than happy to illuminate the boy regarding his ancestry, among other things. The demon ranted to Naruto about all the things he had suffered at the hands of the pathetic humans. At length.

Uzumaki Kushina's chakra chains. Namikaze Minato's hiraishin. Uzumaki Mito's sealing skills - now _there_ was a woman who knew what she was doing. Senju Hashirama's damnable wood release techniques. Uchiha Madara's thrice-cursed _fucking_ sharingan.

Naruto didn't think much of the Uchiha clan either after being subjected to the fox's ran about them and their bloodline.

Occasionally the fox talked about his maker, the Great Sage. The Sage of Six Paths. The only human the fox had any respect for. Ironically, the father of the Senju and the Uchiha clans _both_, who had been at war with each other since the Sage named the younger of his two sons his successor.

Fox was great for a history lesson, if you cared to sift through all his ranting to find what he was actually _saying_.

And then there was the chakra issue. Or perhaps not so much the chakra issue as the _absolute control over the elements of fire and air_. Wasn't perfect of course. Naruto was still a kid after all, and the 'control' reacted to Naruto's emotions perhaps a little too readily. He never felt pain except from within, from forcing his body to do things it wasn't yet capable of doing. Nothing touched him.

Naruto had gotten used to never sleeping by the time he was one year old. Being pinched by his care-taker every time he closed his eyes helped, so did the fox's _constant_ talking. All that chakra flowing through his system kept him alert too. Dark circles were a permanent fixture around his eyes though.

Naruto was five the first time he was exposed to the people of Konoha, and they didn't exactly keep their voices down when they called him a demon. Their 'whispers' made the fox laugh though. Laugh long and laugh loud. It gave Naruto a headache, but he knew that the people were wrong. He knew that he was _not_ the demon. If he was, then it wouldn't be separate inside his head.

Indeed, the people of Konoha had too much belief in the sealing capabilities of the Fourth.

~oOo~

Naruto was graduated from the Academy as soon as the teachers could reasonably get him out, and from there he was put onto a genin team with a couple of older students who hadn't been around him often enough to completely know why everybody else was nervous with him. They would learn quickly enough.

"Alright team nine," the man who was to be their jounin sensei greeted once he had all three of them out of the classroom and somewhere quiet for their introductory team meeting. "Let's introduce ourselves shall we? My name is Nara Shikaku, you will call me Sensei, Nara-sensei or Shikaku-sensei. Honestly I don't much care which, but I expect respect from you as your ranking superior and effective supervisor of all your activities until you make chuunin. Is that clear?"

"Hai, Sensei," the three children answered. Even Naruto, since the fox had never once complained to him yet about anybody called Nara, so Naruto figured it was a case of whatever-until-proven-pain-in-the-arse.

Shikaku nodded. "Alright. I'm the head of the Nara clan, small as it may be. I'm the jounin commander for Konohagakure. I still a member of an active team apart from that, and apart from you. There will be times when I will assign you tasks to do and exercises to perform because I will be unable to personally supervise you due to being called to my duties in one or other of these capacities. It's not personal, it's practical. Is all _that_ clear?"

"Hai, Sensei."

Shikaku nodded again. "You next," he ordered, inclining his head towards one of the chibis sitting in front of him. "Name and what you're best at, if you have a 'best at' for anything yet, also any goals that you are working towards."

"Rock Lee," the boy answered. He was twelve, the average age for a graduate from the academy. He had black hair in a que, thick eyebrows and big black eyes. "I don't have many strengths, but I work hard and want to prove that I can be a good ninja, even without chakra!"

No chakra? Naruto almost approved of the boy by default for his inability to use any of the techniques that would piss off the fox in his head.

The second genin was a girl. She had brown hair and brown eyes and a slight tan. "Tenten," she said. "Just Tenten. I'm good with weapons, and my goal is to be a medic-nin like Senju Tsunade of the Sanin."

Girl just _had_ to set the fox off on a rant about the Senju family. Naruto ignored it though, since he'd heard it all before.

"Uzumaki Naruto. I'm best at going without sleep," he said, then stopped.

"And your goal?" Tenten asked when it became clear that Naruto wasn't going to offer anything else.

Naruto's blue eyes switched from looking at Nara-sensei to the girl beside him. She flinched back at the complete lack of any emotion in his eyes.

"Find a way to put a muzzle on it," he said, looking back at the Nara intently.

Shikaku nodded at this, and to some small measure understood the implication.

"It?" Lee asked.

"Kurama. The Kyuubi no Kitsune," Naruto answered without inflection, without an expression on his face. "The monster that was rather poorly sealed inside me, and talks too much."

Naruto's team-mates suddenly became very pale. To their credit though, they didn't move away from him in fear, or faint. Naruto _might_ be able to tolerate his team-mates for a while. Of course, killing them would always be an option as well...

~The End~


End file.
